Good-Bye Medford, it’s been real.


I’d just like to take a few moments to reflect on our time here at Medford… and when I say ‘our’ time, I really mean my time. It seems like just yesterday when I walked in here for my interview on a brisk and yet sunny March day in 2016. I sat with Danielle Procida in a brand new room under construction that would end up becoming the conference room. We laughed, we cried… we spoke of aspirations and days gone by. Amanda joined us and we locked eyes. I said hello… and she asked why I was staring at her like that… we all chuckled and I was hired shortly thereafter and the rest… well the rest is what you would call history. And as we say good-bye to our home for the last something amount of years, I’d like to show you all what the annals of this place means to me.

Here is the door that I would walk through every morning… also the door that I would have to get up and answer a zillion times because you all would forget your friggan key fobs. Thankful for all the squats you forced me to do. Notice all the bugs smooshed against the sign that probably should have been taped on the inside of the door. A sign of excellence. I will miss you door.


This is the wall where our business model of the 4 C’s is placed. Commitment, Consistency, Cohesiveness and Classiness. How I have said those words over and over again so I never forget. I will miss you wall.








Ah yes, the PRS logo placed in RSS. Many of times I have stopped to pray at this shrine of Facility Maintenance excellence. I also sat under this sign for a good year. Oh, the stories this sign could tell you if it could talk. Thank sweet baby Jesus it cannot. I will miss you sign.








This is where I would stop and get coffee every morning and stare off into space for 5 minutes a day. Well, every day except the last 2 weeks because some boss of mine packed up all the k-cups to ship to Bohemia in advance… just sitting there… waiting… wondering why they haven’t been brewed. Luckily Antonio’s Deli has the worst coffee in the world to suffice. I will miss you little coffee station.







The break room. Our little vacation destination away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Where people’s egg salad would get eaten by someone else. This fridge… where 4 year old Tupperware’s get introduced to half drunken bottles of Coke Zero and expired blue cheese bottles of dressing. Many laughs had in this break room. Many puzzles puzzled. Many day old fish dishes got microwaved. I will miss you break room.







This is me by KL’s office AKA the Lioness’s Den. Oh that sweet spike of anxiety being called in here a time or two without know what you did. Woah baby! But more than that, so many great ideas came out of this room! Also if you ever had the opportunity to sit on the couch on this room… you know what heaven feels like on your tush. I will miss you KL’s office.







And this is me at Amanda’s desk. You know, legend has it that she had an office here once… and I am confirming those rumors to be true! She did… but she wanted to be with us instead of her cushy surroundings. She wanted to be with her soldiers in battle. Side by side through the ups and downs of Harbor Freight and Lidl’s clogged toilets. I’d also get in trouble a lot here. I also spent a lot of time here. I will miss you Amanda’s desk.







And this is me at Peggy’s door. Human Resources… a job that is not always the easiest. I would come and visit, talk shop, ask about why my vacation was declined, ask for advice on stocks and bonds… I even helped interview some of you in this very office! And some of those interviews were crayyyyyyyyy. #WorldStar – This room also single handedly defeated COVID in this office. True Story! I’d also get in a lot of trouble here too. I will miss you Peggy’s office.







This is me knocking on Danielle’s door… because the sign says to do so. Tranquil little spot with the soft shimmer of Christmas lights blinking all year round. The birthplace of the Office Olympics. This where I would say some of the dumbest things I’ve ever said and Danielle would stare through my soul wondering if I knew what I was talking about or if I was just completely talking out of my back side. Aren’t we all just card counters at the black jack table sometimes? I’d get in trouble a lot here. I will miss you Danielle’s office… and later Yondu/Angela’s too!







This is what is left of Moose’s storage closet. A little caulk goes a long way in the trail of sadness for all the times that I had to take down and lift company Christmas trees on top of millions of paint cans. This was also originally a bathroom when we expanded… but then someone went #2 and didn’t flush and that was the end of that. It was converted to a material closet and we had to walk a mile to the bathroom and get harassed by La Femme Nikkita at State Farm about changing our insurance over once a month. I will miss you Moose’s storage closet.







The corner office training room. I actually hate this room. It’s the way the light hits it… and it’s hot and stuffy. Plus the spiders hang here. I won’t miss you corner office room. I just won’t.









Le ol’ Conference Room. A French quarter with bay windows. My home away from home. The War room. What can I say about this room that hasn’t been said before. Countless trainings, quarterlies and events planned here. Double bookings and getting booted out of here was a way of life. The Zoom calls that would pull at your heart strings. Where you needed to yell at each other to be heard. At any point, the white board consisted of a tic-tac-toe game, plans for Q4, your 3rd seat relocation in two months and a sick ‘Maddie wuz here’ script in the corner. The Room was our club PRS. And we brought the house down here. I will miss you conference room.






State Farm GuyThis place was known for it’s celebrity sightings. Michelle from the Deli. Little Dave from the Deli even though you always screw up my order. The suave guy from Hunter that would just walk in here like he owned the place. The grounds keeper. Both of them. Elena and even Jake from state farm. I will miss all you celebrities of Medford! Especially you Jake… from state farm.








The bathroom. The number one spot for everything selfie. The Instagram models that were created here are countless. If you ever worked here, you know what Im talking about. Forget backdrops like the Eiffel tower and the New York City Sky line… we have a beige tile backdrop, a dirty mirror and the ever popular ‘ill peace sign’ to display which I’m showing off in this one picture only. Bonus points if you show a little mid drift while flashing gangsta signs while holding your phone for the eventual 17 likes. You’re the real MVP’s. Keep smiling, that 18th like from that ‘random dude who has always made you feel uncomfortable every time he’s around you’ is just moments away! I will miss you bathroom and selfie mirror.





And that’s it. Good-bye Medford, Antonio’s, Lucky Fortune, Cactus Café, New Wee Yo, that weird guy from Genova’s, the guy who yelled ‘Breakfast’ from the Bagel place by the DMV. Good-bye to the weird tech kids from Hunter, the printers that worked half the time, the parking lot that could be hella shady, Rodolfo the cleaning guy and that Gazebo that should be bulldozed to the ground. I will miss you. All of you.